Idiot

Once upon a time, there was an idiot whose name was Ngoc. Ngoc had a wife who didn’t like him to stay home and do nothing. One day, when they were sitting by the other, his wife told:

“Husband you can’t continue doing nothing. You must find a job to do if you want to live with me in long time”

“Do what?” said Ngoc, “I don’t know write or read and besides, not smart as others so what can I do?”

“Do business”, said his wife.

“Business? What?” said Ngoc.

“All things which bring to you benefit”, said his wife, “Firstly, you can buy and sell chickens and ducks. Later, you can buy and sell wood”.

Few days later, Ngoc brought money and set off. He remembered his wife’s saying so that he found the way to trade ducks. He didn’t need long time to find what he need. He saw ducks they were about dozen of ducks swimming in the lake which was by his way but they were wild ducks and he didn’t know that so he walked to find the owner of the ducks. He saw some children near that.

“Whose ducks are boy?” he said.

“What do you ask for?” asked the children.

“I want to buy them”, he replied them.

It seemed a joke a person wanted to buy wild ducks so that the children wanted to try their luck.

“They were ours”, said one of children, “If you want to buy we will sell you in very cheap price. Five quan* (ancient currency unit) for all”.

Ngoc seemed not to have any doubt, he gave them money. The children immediately knew that who they met was an idiot so they got the money, divide then directed him.

“Duck now belong to you. Stay here and keep watching on your ducks and till afternoon you can lead them to home”, said the children before they scattered.

Ngoc stayed on the shore watching his duck. It’s over noon he wanted to lead the ducks to home so he waded in the lake and planned to direct them. But the wild ducks just saw a human, immediately scattered away they flew up the sky. Ngoc turned silly looking at the ducks which had been away from him. Later, he made his way back home and told his wife the things happening in day.

“Gosh! They are wild ducks.” Said his wife, stressing each word, “Wild ducks look like bred ducks. If you want to know which they are, you only need to wave a stick. Wild ducks will fly up while bred ducks not”.

Some days later, Ngoc one more time set off. He went to market where he met a person who sold three piggies. The piggies were rounded in fence which was not too high that they could jump out. Ngoc approached the person and expressed that he wanted to buy. But, before he gave money to the person, he remembered his wife’s words how to know wild and bred ducks. Therefore, he did exactly what his wife said he picked a stick and poked at the piggies. The piggies were frightened they jumped out and ran away. They all disappeared into bushes. The owner of piggies immediately grabbed on his clothes asking for money. So that, all of money he brought had to pay for the piggies. Sadly he went home and told to his wife.

“Omg!” his wife screamed, “How can piggies fly. You only need to buy and bring them to home. Don’t need to do any thing more”.

Then Ngoc set off again. This time he bought potteries. He followed his wife’s words shouldering the potteries straightly his home not caring about any things all people met him on the way had to make their way to dodge him. But, animals weren’t enough smart to do that. That day, many of buffaloes were striding on the way back to his home. The road was too narrow for the crowd of buffaloes. He, besides, didn’t know to dodge them. Therefore, almost of his potteries were broken when he arrived to home.

“Potteries are things which are easy to be broken so that you had to dodge animals when you meet them, okay!” said his wife.

Short time later, Ngoc again set off. That time he bought lime. He shouldered the lime to home but on the way he met a dead mouse which was lying at the middle of the road. “Well well”, he thought, “My wife told that I had to dodge animals”. So that, he didn’t to go cross the mouse he waded into a small stream next to that. The stream was pretty deep the lime met water and so that water was boiled. He was scared getting rid of the lime and running toward home. He told his wife in crying. His wife only knew to scream.

“Omg! I have never seen anyone more stupid than you”, said his wife, “because of you now we have no money. Tomorrow, find the way to have some money.”

Ngoc changed his job he decided to become a thief. At a night, he found the way went in a house. The people in the house were in deep sleeps. After long time searching, he found some coins and because oil lamp in the house still lighted he brought the coins to the lamp and watched. Unfortunately, what he got were coins made of copper which were very cheap. Immediately, he found the owners.

“Wake! Wake up”, he shook one person lying on bed, “Wake to change coins”

The owner woke up and saw a stranger. He immediately yelled that people in the house woke up too.

“Thief! Thief! Catch him!”

Ngoc turned scared he left the coins and ran away the place. He told his wife after he came home.

“Gosh!” said his wife, slapping on her forehead, “You don’t need to change. Right, tomorrow you only need to find some milled rice we have been out of rice”.

That night, Ngoc left. he could easily go in a house but there was had no milled rice in that house and Ngoc only followed his wife’s words finding milled rice. At last, he only found rice which was not yet milled. There had a millstone near that so he milled the rice. The noise which spread from the millstone was too noisy and made the people in the house wake up. The people saw him and planned to catch him but he dodged and escaped from the place. Ngoc came back home and told to his wife. His wife as the other times had no many thing to do but to cry.

“Stupid! Tomorrow, take anything you see.” “Don’t need to do anything” his wife stressed.

That night, Ngoc another time found the way to go in a house. He saw a lot of stuff which was scattering in a corner of the yard.

“My wife told I could pick anything I saw” he whispered to himself. Therefore, he stuck up all the stuff, tied then shouldered it back home. His wife lighted the lamp when he came home and there was rubbish the things he brought back, broken brooms, broken pots, and many other things like that. His wife did a chuck.

“It’s too dangerous continue being a thief. You will go in to death one day”, said his wife, “Tommorrow, you do as a beggar. It’s a little ashamed but you can have yourself safe”.

Days later, Ngoc set off. He did as his wife’s words doing as a beggar. He saw a person who was in nice clothes so he immediately approached the person, raised his hand to have some money but he was prevented by two guardians. The person in nice clothes he met was no one but a mandarin. The guardians beat him painedly so that the run away from them as fast as he could. He came back home and told his wife.

“He’s a mandarin. Don’t mess with people like him if you don’t want to die”, said his wife, “Tommorrow, find the way to crowds of people. If a person doesn’t do you a favor, the others will do”.

The next morning he went out and the first crowd of people he met was a funeral. He followed his wife’s saying approaching the funeral, showing his hand to people who was crying by the coffin of the death. The people didn’t give him anything they scolded and chased him away. He left and came back home to tell his wife.

“That’s a funeral husband. You must follow them and cry. Pretend as if you are very pained. Then, they will give you some food after the funeral finish”.

Days later, Ngoc was on his way he met another crowd. There was a wedding but he didn’t know. He joined in the wedding and started crying, so pained. People in the wedding thought he was trying to bring bad luck to them. Therefore, they rounded him and beat him painfully. Though he felt very pained, he tried to run away the place coming home and telling his wife.

“Gosh! That’s a wedding. You must say some good sayings”, said his wife.

Short time later, he met a crowd of people who was trying to extinguish a fire. Ngoc hurriedly approached the crowd.

“Congratulations! Congratulations!” he said.

People thought that he’s the person who fired the place so that they caught him and beat him. He hardly begged them and got away the place. He told his wife and then she said:

“That a fire. You have to pour water over it.”

Few days later, Ngoc was striding on street market he met some blacksmiths who were banging on a iron bar and under bar was a fire. Hurriedly, Ngoc took a little water then poured over the heated iron bars. At one, the blacksmiths left their hammers, grabbed and beat him. He brought the injuries back home and told his wife.

“They are blacksmiths husband. You need to help them few bangs they will thank you”, said his wife.

Time later, Ngoc met another crowd of people. There were people who were fighting. Ngoc didn’t say anything he ran toward them then he punched a person one hit, kicked the other one hit. The people were very angry wanting to beat the other but suddenly a stranger appeared and beat them that made them turned angrier. They stopped fought the other and they both hit him. Ngoc ran to home and told his wife.

“The people were fighting. You have to prevent them, talk them to stop and they, maybe, invited you to drink”, said his wife.

Short time later, Ngoc crossed a place where people were seeing a buffalo fighting. Ngoc remembered his wife’s words so that he ran to between of the buffaloes and stopped them.

“Stooop! Stop!” said him but he couldn’t. One of the buffaloes hit him by it horn. Ngoc died and the story of him ended at there.

THE END

"Translator: Hung Nguyen"

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